when i was childaged. primary school...

i had a problem learning how to spell people.

teachers would shout at me every time and make me spell it over and over and over until they just gave up.

pepple

peeple

peepal

a friend told me i was missing the o.

peepol

pepploe

one day i got it right. if i learnt anything from school it's how to spell people.

now i need to learn what those smudged dots and the winkyeye symbol are for.

bah hate reading stuff i dont know my point

I HAS PURPLE ARM CAST!!!

coolest kid in town

when i gets all drunk bad things happen. i nevre shake the toes hard enough. twould raise thr dead. yup. HEY 30 years to still feel THIS. over what? nonethig. wish brain dealt weith simples. wish this could be dumb like ""oh i miss getting laid sos i feel thr sad". wish my hand woild juist be fixed so i can do sytuff like type proper. tjhat my 3 wishsss. i miss stuff but it aint none of that reasoning. we all get that anid sigh but live on. i bet stability is overrated anys. is my hausraising to blame? this homemade whine goes straight to ny badside of head. can i watcjh you rip me apart and grin through it? ask yrseklf, when i;m dead and cutopen will there be nothing but images of you? i cant answer that. srgpjionkponiporgsnippjiopjiipjhpjjip9srhpin

KB

she cries and thank fuck it plays no sound. not looking forward to that. total GUUHG

red throat. stop smoking?

paranoia. too much listening?

avoidence. the way shit goes?

always owing rent. budget. at least that one's simple.

stayed awake for 32 hours to get out of this sleep crap. was nice to wake up to a morning. then an hour nap turned into five. back awake all night.

i puke up my hands.

lies about me [part one]

the bambi, she say i look like sloth animal! then i is kor..um korwa..um kwala bear from the southworldpart animal!! but this is not true. i must find other katizardz to fluids breeed with n educate narly world of its ignora n kvltrule. stipid knownothings! the breed of mine, as you shall see it all with all yr blueies or/and browns, shall remain long with our daemonds n we invert their spines n trail them with skiddiemarkens all the way down it n ups. RAWRR! when you has the chillds we shall taken them in our undieground protectcavas n implant/impale tails upon their tiny backbutts n RACEMIX into powerwarriorrrwses.

why i wake up n decide for internet?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6KM6Y9hYnlE [gross]

back to bed

even when doing the best thing (for me) i feel that harsh guilt like i've really caused something bad to happen and wanting to take it all back for fear it's not the best thing (for her) afterall. but it's too late. every choice i make is too late. or one i cannot reverse. and it always effects the people i give a fuck about most. i always discover the lies, but never from the source.

"i love you"

"i'm sorry"

words i only hear when something is wanted from me, and never just forgiveness.

FUCK OFF

does ANYONE have a grip?? i'm better off alone. i'm better off unfeeling. i would selfishly trade for something else. i so easily fall back into old methods. and all the while, look around at other people and wonder.. what the fuck are you doing??!